Friday, May 30, 2008

Line of Gay Men Waiting for Blowjobs from Michael Oliver?

Here's a nice picture of gay homeless men lined up. I heard that these men are waiting in line for blowjobs from Michael Oliver Ponce and to also have anal sex with Ponce. Does anyone know if there is any truth to this rumor?

Be sure to check out the crazy-looking mongoloid in the upper right-hand corner of the photo. He's wearing a red shirt that appears to have the number 18 written on it. I'll bet that dude really gave it to Ponce!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Was Michael Recently Fired by Chris Burke?


I have on good authority that Michael Oliver was recently fired from his roadie duties for Chris Burke's hardcore queercore band! I'm sure that everyone remembers Chris Burke from his role as "Corky" on the show Life Goes On. It seems that somehow Michael sought out Chris and they began a heavy love affair. Chris invited Michael to be the groups roadie and off Michael went on the road with Chris and his band. However, things turned sour when Michael placed an enormous poster of his head on the stage along with the band's equipment. Michael tried to explain to Chris that he was trying to generate a buzz at St. Pauls Elderly Home so that the people would know that he "Michael Oliver" was the roadie for the show. To make matters worse later that night while on the tour bus Chris walked in on his bandmates, the Demasi twins, spitroasting Oliver!!! Well that was enough for Corky and he fired Michael on the spot! I'm bummed as I was hoping to catch Michael when Corky and his band played at a local Jr. High School!

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Does Michael Oliver Beg for "Fart" Meals Outside Old Country Buffet?


I have heard from many good sources that Michael Oliver has hit what I consider to be rock bottom! I have heard that in recent weeks he has been spotted outside an Old Country Buffet near his sewer home. He lays by the front doors and pretends to be in pain by moaning. He only does this to people who have already eaten and are on their way out of the restaurant. When some nice soul stops to ask what's wrong Oliver says he is hungry and begs them to fart some of the Old Country Buffet goodness into his mouth! Most people walk away after hearing this request, but enough comply to keep Oliver returning! No one knows if Oliver actually considers a fart to the face "eating" or if it's to fulfill a sick sexual fantasy of Olivers!

UPDATE: Michael Oliver has been banned from the above mentioned Old Country Buffet for harassing their patrons. He has gone back to his sewer home.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Is Michael Oliver a Bug Chaser?

The Rolling Stone magazine published an article about gay men who have unprotected gay sex in the hope of contracting the deadly HIV virus. Such behavior is somewhat common in the gay community and gay men who engage in such risky practices desiring to contract HIV are called "bug chasers." Does anyone know whether Michael Oliver Ponce is a bug chaser? He's probably ingested thousands of gallons of HIV juice at rest stops and gas station bathrooms over the years!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Michael Oliver's Role in "Alien Autopsy"

One of Michael Oliver Ponce's most unusal roles was in the 1995 TV special, Alien Autopsy - Fact or Fiction. It aired on the FOX network during the summer in 1995. Michael acted in the original footage without using any make up at all! Ray Santilli, a London-based video entrepreneur, claimed to have original black-and-white video footage on an autopsy being performed on one of the aliens allegedly captured in Roswell, New Mexico in 1947. He peddled his footage of what was supposedly the autopsy to various networks and FOX produced a special show about the footage.

The alien autopsy footage was later proved to be a fake when John Ritter recognized Michael Oliver Ponce as the alleged alien carcass. Here are some images of Ponce from that TV special:

Is Michael Oliver Hung Like a Tic-Tac?

I heard a rumor the other day that Michael Oliver Ponce has an extremely tiny penis. Does anyone know if there is any truth to this rumor?

Supposedly it is the size of a Tic-Tac breath mint. Of course, popping a Tic-Tac breath mint into one's mouth would freshen one's breath, whereas popping Ponce's tiny Tic-Tac sized cock into one's mouth would make one's breath smell like Ponce's stank balls and ass. Ponce, maybe you should approach Ferraro, the company that manufactures Tic-Tacs, and try to convince them to create a new flavor that tastes like your smelly balls and ass - I'm sure it would be a top seller in the deviant homosexual community!

Saturday, May 3, 2008

Michael Oliver Loves Having Random Dudes Fart in His Face?


I have heard from terrific sources that Michael Oliver's favorite hobby is to have random dudes sit on his face and blow ass! He also very much enjoys farting on his hand and smelling it! I'm told that he loves to eat garbage and excrement then he waits for his digestive system to produce some rank farts. He cups his hand beneath his ass and farts into it. He then immediately takes his still cupped hand up to his face and deeply breathes in his own flatulence. I've been told that when doing this he moans in ecstasy as this is the most pleasurable thing for him other then young Mexican boys farting directly into his face! Rumor has it that Michael tried storing his farts in a Mason jar but he found the farts deteriorated and didn't provide the same level of pleasure he receives from a "fresh" fart. Way to go Mikey that sounds uber disgusting! The picture is of one of Michaels lovers farting in his face during a "fart frenzy".

Friday, May 2, 2008

Michael Oliver's Role In "Star Wars: Return of the Jedi"

The most successful movie in which Michael Oliver Ponce has ever acted was 1983's hit, Star Wars: Return of the Jedi. In it, Ponce played Admiral Akbar, the Supreme Commander of the Rebel Alliance Fleet fighting against the forces of evil! A picture of Ponce dressed up as Admiral Akbar is shown below. As one can clearly see, Ponce wore minimal makeup for this role and, in fact, the only way to tell that he's an admiral is by looking at the shirt he's wearing! Ponce really fit the look for this role, although I think he should have shaved his whiskers before appearing in the movie.

Speaking of admirals, I wonder if Darth Vader gave Ponce a "rear admiral" on the rowdy Return of the Jedi set...

Michael Oliver's Role in "Annie"

In 1982, Michael Oliver Ponce starred as a little orphan in the box office hit, Annie. Ponce played a homeless little girl who is orphaned during the Great Depression and lives in an orphanage with a runaway dog until she is adopted by a rich man. I personally thought that Annie totally sucked when I saw it as a child, although it was fairly popular. Ponce did, however, impress me with his immense talents as a character actor, wearing a dress throughout the movie and getting a firecrotch perm!

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Michael Oliver's Role in "Creature From The Black Lagoon"

One of Michael Oliver Ponce's first movie roles was as Gill-man, an amphibious monster living in an Amazonian rain forest, in Creature From the Black Lagoon. Ponce played the title character in this horror flick and he did so without wearing any makeup, resulting in a fast shoot for the movie! Here's a picture of Ponce from the movie: