Is There a Rubik's Cube Stuck in Michael Oliver's Colon?

I heard a rumor that Michael Oliver Ponce brought a Rubik's Cube with him to the set of Problem Child 2 and had a tantrum because he couldn't solve the famous 3-dimensional puzzle. Apparently Big Ben Healy became irate at Ponce's whining and violently shoved the Rubik's Cube up Ponce's ass. Supposedly the Rubik's Cube still resides in Ponce's colon and can be felt by anyone having anal sex with Ponce.

Has anyone else heard this rumor or know whether there is any thruth to this rumor?

Did Michael Oliver Molest a Bear?

I've heard from good sources that park rangers in California are currently investigating the possibility the Michael "Ponce" Oliver recently molested a gay black bear. It seems that Michael and the bear had hit it off during one of Michaels forays into the California woods when Michael got a bit inappropriate. It seems that after spending most of the day with Oliver the bear grew to hate him and his rank ass and was actually planning on eating him. Oliver however had different plans and tried to put the moves on the bear. When he was rebuffed Michael got very mad and forced the bear to lick his stank ass taint! The bear reported this to park rangers and the description the bear gave led the investigation directly to Oliver. Stay tuned!!!

Does Michael Oliver Enjoy Being Tea-bagged?

I wonder whether Michael Oliver Ponce enjoys tea-bagging... I'll bet he loves it when sweaty homeless men dunk their nuts into his mouth! Ponce probably sucks all of the sweat, dirt, and lice off those dirty nuts within minutes. Ponce probably also likes it when a homeless man farts right in his face while also tea-bagging Ponce! Man, Ponce must be extremely horny and demented!

Michael Oliver's New Lover?

I have on good authority that this fine strapping man is Michael Olivers new lover! (Sorry guys he's off the market again!) It seems that this is Cledus, Michael's 3rd cousin and the two of them are going at it hot and heavy!!! Michael treated Cledus to a fine meal of Old Country Buffet farts. Then the lovers went back to Michael's sewer home for some HOT lovemaking!! I hear that they are trying to create a buttbaby!!!! I'm sure that it would be demented and would have the best mullet ever. So far the relationship is just about massive amounts of butt loving and Old Country Buffet but some insiders think that a gay marriage may occur down the road!!! Stay Tuned!!!


UPDATE: Michael and Cledus have broken up! It seems that after the recent allegations of Michael molesting a bear Cledus kicked him to the curb. Hot studs be on the lookout as Ponce is back on the market!

Michael Oliver in the Gayest Video Ever!

HEY MIKEY O! Big Ben Healey found the skeletons in your fucking closet! Yeah, I remember when you had a stint as the singer from Rammstein, and you made what has to be the Mount Vernon of queerness! This is what happens when you welsh on Big Ben Healey debts! Hope Ninja Gaiden was worth it, fuckface!